'I have 3 reasons to hate Leo': Messi-Cristiano doppelganger reveals his favorite player
As many of you already know from my stories here, I do look like a child of Messi and Cristiano if they were a gay couple (Messi would be the father, ahaha).
However, it’s Leo whom I hate the most and here’s why.
1. Antonella
I love Messi’s wife to death is basically my middle name. I worship her so much that my right wrist is way bigger and stronger than the left one. I just cannot come to terms that she’s Messi’s wife, although I look a bit like him, too, and I’m much taller and more muscular than him. But it’s Leo who gets all the juicy bits - and not me!
2. Cash deposits
I’m much more intelligent than him and have read more books than he has netted goals for Barca. But it’s again him who’s a millionaire and I’m just an ordinary guy who knows all the best places in La Boqueria food market where you can find cheap groceries. That’s actually also one of the reasons why Antonella is Messi’s wife and not mine (oh, please, don’t tell me crap about their ‘true love’, especially when Messi traveled to Barcelona for the first time and Antonella was hanging out with another goofy-looking dude during the ‘half-time break’).
3. Messi knows how to avoid taxes without getting into jail
Messi, along with his father Jorge, was found guilty of defrauding Spain of €4.1m between 2007 and 2009. The pair had been found guilty of using tax havens in Belize (of all places) and Uruguay to conceal earnings from image rights. What happened next? NOTHING. His 21-month prison sentence for tax fraud has been changed to a fine by the Spanish courts. He just must pay €252,000, equating to €400 for each day of the sentence, the court said in a statement. I wish to be able to get away with stuff like that in such a swift fashion!
Thus, my favorite player is Ronaldinho. A player with a crystal clear reputation, unmatched natural talent and who also likes to lay other men’s babes.
Comments
Perhaps you can change the title to 'I have 3 reasons to be jealous of Leo'. I think it would fit your blog better.
Or ,I am crazy and have plenty of time,
Yeah thats right
WTF is this ?
what rubbish is guy saying here?